Coming Out to Friends
Coming out to friends is often the first step many LGBT individuals take on their path to being open about their identity. Oftentimes people choose to come out to friends first as they are the people they feel closest to and have the most in common with. If a friend is supportive of your coming out, they can even help you come out to your family, school, or community.
As with coming out to anyone, coming out to friends can lead to a variety of different reactions, so it is helpful to be prepared for as many reactions as you can. Your friend may be immediately accepting and supportive, or they may take some time to become understanding. Take note of how your friend reacts to current events or gossip surrounding LGBT issues. If they treat the issue jokingly and make fun of LGBT peers, it may not be safe to come out to them. Alternatively, coming out to your friend may change their view and they may try to become more accepting. It is hard to judge exactly how your friend will react, so come out to them only when you feel comfortable enough to.
Once you have decided to come out to a friend, be prepared. People often take some time to come to terms with your coming out, so be patient and allow them to ask you questions if they are confused. Some may have some experience with another friend coming out to them in the past, and will take less time to understand. A friend might be upset that you didn't trust them enough to come out to them earlier. LGBT people who come out to their friends usually find that when they come out, a friend will reveal that they already guessed they were queer, or come out right back to them!
Coming out can often change your relationship with your friends. You may be closer than ever, or you may start to drift apart. Your friend might worry that you came out to them because you have a crush on them. Some may begin to question their own identity after learning about yours. Do not worry, as only in extreme cases would you lose a friend by coming out to them. Give each one time to adjust, and remind them that you trust them enough to come out to them and you want to be honest with who you are.
As with coming out to anyone, coming out to friends can lead to a variety of different reactions, so it is helpful to be prepared for as many reactions as you can. Your friend may be immediately accepting and supportive, or they may take some time to become understanding. Take note of how your friend reacts to current events or gossip surrounding LGBT issues. If they treat the issue jokingly and make fun of LGBT peers, it may not be safe to come out to them. Alternatively, coming out to your friend may change their view and they may try to become more accepting. It is hard to judge exactly how your friend will react, so come out to them only when you feel comfortable enough to.
Once you have decided to come out to a friend, be prepared. People often take some time to come to terms with your coming out, so be patient and allow them to ask you questions if they are confused. Some may have some experience with another friend coming out to them in the past, and will take less time to understand. A friend might be upset that you didn't trust them enough to come out to them earlier. LGBT people who come out to their friends usually find that when they come out, a friend will reveal that they already guessed they were queer, or come out right back to them!
Coming out can often change your relationship with your friends. You may be closer than ever, or you may start to drift apart. Your friend might worry that you came out to them because you have a crush on them. Some may begin to question their own identity after learning about yours. Do not worry, as only in extreme cases would you lose a friend by coming out to them. Give each one time to adjust, and remind them that you trust them enough to come out to them and you want to be honest with who you are.
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